Birds of a Feather by Three-time Olympian Ruben Gonzalez

Who are you regularly hanging around with? Who you surround yourself with will determine how far you go. In fact it’s 90% of success.

When I was young, my Dad always told me was to watch out who I associated with. He always encouraged me to surround myself with winners. Dad would say, “You need to hang around people you have respect for, not people you have influence over.”

“If all you ever do is hang around people you have influence over, you’re like the big fish in the small pond. Sure it feels good – you’re the big shot. But since no one is pushing you, since no one is challenging you, you never get any better.”

Dad said I needed to force myself to hang around successful people. Successful people think big. They are always focusing on the possibilities. They are always asking themselves, “What if?” “Why not?” “Why wait?”

My dad said I would feel uncomfortable, out of place, and like I didn’t belong. But, if I hung around big thinkers long enough, eventually, I would begin to think big, too. Dad said that successful people would always challenge me and encourage me to be my best; to continuously strive to reach higher levels of performance. They would always be a ‘phone call away’ to steer me right.

My father added that when those successful people started to believe in me, I would begin to believe in myself, too, because I respected their opinions. And that’s exactly what happened.

Sometimes, to develop a belief system in yourself, you have to trust the opinions and beliefs others have in you until you gain confidence and your own belief system kicks in.

After I decided to take up the sport of luge and train for the 1988 Calgary Winter Olympics, decision making became pretty simple for me. I knew that every action I took in the next four years was either going to get me closer to my goal or pull me away from my goal. Everything I did would make a difference. Especially the people I associated with...

You see, there are two kinds of people in the world. They are either on your team or they are not in your team. They are either on your dream team or they are not. People will either encourage you or cast doubt. If they doubt you can do it, they could steal your dream away!

Associating with negative people makes us think negatively. Close contact with petty individuals develops petty habits in us. On the other hand, companionship with people with big ideas raises the level of our thinking; close contact with ambitious people helps make us more ambitious.

I came to the realization that if someone laughed at my dream; they were laughing at me. If they did not believe in me, I stopped associating with them. I had to. They had the power to make me doubt myself and ultimately quit.

I was taking up the luge at the age of 21 - way too old! And I was trying to qualify for the Olympics just four years away! I could not leave anything to chance. I did not have time to waste. I needed to know right away who was for me and who was not.

How did I do it? I told everyone I spoke with about my dream. If they laughed at me, rolled their eyes, or in any way showed lack of belief, I stopped associating with them. I could not afford to. They were a dream stealer. However, if they got excited about my dream, I held on to them like they were made out of Gold! I’d just found myself a cheerleader.

By doing this all the time, before long I could have filled a cheering section with my supporters. An unexpected benefit of doing this was that I created a positive pressure that kept me from quitting when the going got tough. You see, no matter how rough a day I was having at the track, it was going to be easier to get back on the sled than to come back home and tell everyone that I had quit.

Birds of a feather flock together. Make sure you’re in the right flock. Make sure you’re in a flock that’s flying in the direction you want to go. It’s your choice. If you consistently spend time with people that are where you want to be, before long you’ll be reaching all of you goals and dreams. You’ll reach them in no time flat!
 

Ruben Gonzalez is an award-winning keynote speaker and the author of the critically acclaimed book, “The Courage to Succeed.” His experiences as a three-time Olympian and as the owner of two businesses give him a unique perspective on how to conquer the corporate struggles of today. For his free 10-Part Success e-Course, visit www.StartWinningMore.com or contact him at 832-689-8282.